Friday, May 23, 2008

Ironic...

Ironic. That is the word that immediately comes to mind as I think about this whole weight loss thing. Might seem like a strange word, but let me explain. My friend Jessa is the one who kinda got me started on this whole I need to publicly declare my goal thing. I have been wanting to shed some weight for a while - but something she said just struck a chord with me and really made me want to do it this time. And I think that it is awesome and has actually started a couple of other friends along with us in the journey. As I was reading her blog today - something struck me... she refers to herself at times when I knew her here in Phoenix and was (ashamed to say this) a little jealous of her. Ok, Ok, maybe a LOT jealous of her. She is beautiful. Really, really pretty. The kind of pretty that looks like she just woke up that way - so natural but striking. Her blog talks about her wanting to be the best and I look at her pics posted and think - she is what I consider my best... if only I could be where she is starting...

And then I was talking to Ally on the phone who was baking cookies AND getting ready to take Abby to a Girl Scouts Award thing. I asked her if she needed to go - she said nope - I am just going as I am - I will throw on some lipstick but my hair is in "that nasty knot thing that I always do." And that is when I decided to write this blog. You see - "that nasty know thing that I always do" is one of the things that I admire about her. It could be 5am - Ally will be up, showered, spraying off the front patio. She has this one lipstick that is her signature color on and her hair is always twisted up in this ADORABLE little twist, knot thing. I always think to myself - why can't I look like that when I am just up taking care of things around the house? So when she mentioned that she looked 1/2 done and didn't care because she was just going to be with little girls.. it hit me.

Why is it that we see what is so "right" in other people but we can't see it in ourselves? Why is it that when I look pretty dang cute for just getting out of bed - I only see the stray hairs and the belly? I think this is part of the key. The key to unlocking who I really want to be physically. I need to lighten up on myself and try to see myself through other people's eyes instead of my critical ones. I need to look to realistic models of who I want to be and how I want to portray myself instead of comparing myself to someone who has millions of dollars and uses them to employ chefs, trainers, hair stylists, etc. (Come on - if I didn't have to think about anything - of course I could always be my best.)

So to all of us who are on this "Bringing Back _______ (insert name) Tour" as Jessa calls it... I challenge you to think back to the compliments you get that you roll your eyes at - and start to believe them.

The funny thing about beauty is that it is usually only skin deep. But when you couple it with a great heart and some un-egotistical confidence - WHAM ... it becomes TRUE beauty. Beauty that radiates a love for life, a love for self and a love for Christ.

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2 comments:

Jessa said...

Crying. Thank you for that. Right when I needed it most. I have been so amazed lately at who and what God has presented to my life. It is so surreal. Maybe I never opened my eyes before.

kris10 said...

Oh Lees...thanks for sharing. You know that you are beautiful...just as you are. We always have a version of ourselves in our head that tells us "when I look like this, then..." The truth is, we are who we are in this moment for a reason and no matter how much we weigh, lose, whatever...we are beautiful...and this comes not from the way we look, but rather for the One who lives in and through us! I say this as much to myself as I do to you...